


The things I'd like to tell you right now

by auaruf



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: F/M, Het, Morning After, Ten POV
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-17
Updated: 2015-01-17
Packaged: 2018-03-07 22:36:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 664
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3185798
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/auaruf/pseuds/auaruf
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ten POV. The morning after.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The things I'd like to tell you right now

**Author's Note:**

> Beta'd by [thestars-arefire](thestars-arefire.tumblr.com)

It’s like when you want to sleep, but you shouldn’t.

You have to do something, something _really_ important, but your eyes close every second. So you give up.

You let them finally close, you turn off the lights and you try to relax. For the first minutes everything is fine. But then your legs twitch, or you aren’t comfortable enough and you wake up.

And for a moment you don’t know what to do. You look everywhere, looking for answers you already know you won’t find in the wall of a room that isn’t yours.

If you weren’t too scared to turn your gaze and look on your left, where there’s the reason of your questions, maybe you’d be asleep for a while.

But the problem isn’t being awake. The problem is you _want_ to be awake. You _have_ to be awake. You can’t have the luxury of sleeping.

 

And then you realize.

 

It is working exactly in the same way.

 

In _that_ same way, you figure out you love her, _oh Rassilon you love her so much_ , but you are still looking for that impulse, for that noise, that will make you stand up and run away.

But you can’t move, you can’t get out of the bed that’s burning your skin, telling you to run away as fast as you can.

Even if you really should.

In _that_ same way, you want her, you have always wanted her and right now you want her even more because after what happened you know you wouldn’t live without her, without her soft skin under your palms, without her scent filling your lungs, without her body in your arms.

And you know you shouldn’t. And you keep try to think about anything different, anything else, anything.

 _I have to repair that lever that keeps getting stuck. I never actually understood what is its use, but it always makes a funny noise when you pull it and she always laughs at it and I always want her laughing even if she’s laughing at me because her laugh is important, her laugh is oxygen_ – stop.

 _Maybe I should try that new hair gel I bought on Bolixt’an, they said it makes hair softer and glossy and maybe she would touch it or or or she could help me styling it and_ – you have to stop.

(Everyone knows the more you try not to think about something, the more you will think about it, but right now you don’t seem to remember.)

 _I definitely have to try that banana tiramisù recipe I found. Yep, definitely. I don’t cook, but I will surely give it a try because I know sooner or later she would come in the kitchen to see what I’m doing and she would hug me from behind, posing her chin on my shoulder to see me at work, circling my waist with her arm like she’s doing right now and ooh this is so comfortable why weren’t you doing it bef_ – wait.

You’re still in the same position as before, lying on your side and facing the wall, but there’s something warm on your stomach.

 

Here it is.

 

The impulse.

 

The noise.

 

You have finally found it.

 

_Run. I have to run._

 

You’re already moving, lifting the covers and don’t face the reality because you’re too scared.

But that arm that is circling your waist hardens its grip, asking you to not run away, _begging_ you to not run away.

And the impulse abates.

And you’re frozen again.

You don’t know what to do.

You will not run away, but you will certainly not move any muscle.

Then you feel eyes burning your cheeks,  asking you to turn your face, _begging_ you to turn your face and meet their gaze.

 

 

 

 

You turn yourself.

 

 

 

 

You meet _her_ eyes.

 

 

 

 

She doesn’t look away.

 

 

 

 

_Aren’t you afraid of my eyes?_

 

 

 

 

“Hey.”

 

 

 

 

_Aren’t you ashamed of my eyes?_

 

 

 

 

“Hey.”

 

 

 

 

_Oh, the things I’d like to tell you right now._


End file.
